Don't Forget Those Brief Episodes of Insanity

In the same way that we get brief glimpses of heaven, we sometimes get brief episodes of insanity. Don't forget them. And don't forget the slough of despond.

Read Job today (5/2/15). Here are some quotes that had real meaning for me:

The Lord gave and the Lord has taken away.

Shall we accept good from God, and no trouble?

Why is life given to those who are bitter to their soul?

What I feared has come upon me; what I dreaded has happened to me. I have no peace, no quietness; I have no rest, but only turmoil. [this has been my life for the last three years...it is too hard to describe...for those who have never experienced such depth of despair, they have no ability to identify]

Resentment kills a fool, and envy slays the simple. I myself have a seen a fool take root.

Man is born to trouble as surely as sparks fly upward.

I would appeal to God [and I have]. I would lay my cause before him [and I have]. - but have not heard from him. He [may] perform wonders that cannot be fathomed, miracles that cannot be counted. [but I have not seen them]

Blessed is the man whom God corrects; so do not despise the discipline of the Almighty. [this is about the only thing I can hang my hope on]

If only my anguish could be weighed and all my misery be placed on the scales! [my misery and anguish have been a lot]

The arrows of the Almighty are in me, my spirit drinks in their poison. [this is how I feel]

Oh, that I might have my request, that God would grant what I hope for, that God would be willing to crush me, to let loose his hand and cut me off! [I have felt this way]

My joy is unrelenting pain [although I have just had unrelenting pain...no joy]

What strength do I have, that I should still hope? What prospects, that I should be patient? [none...I am despairing]

I have been allotted months of futility, and nights of misery have been assigned to me. When I lied down I think, "How long before I get up?" The nights drags on, and I toss till dawn. {this describes my life over the past three years to a T}

I will not keep silent; I will speak out in the anguish of my spirit. I will complain to the bitterness of my soul. [and I have]

Why do you not pardon my offenses and forgive my sins? [I have asked God this over and over...how much more do I have to endure]

When he passes me, I cannot see him; when he goes by, I cannot perceive him. [this is how I feel about God and how he has treated me]

I despise my own life.

My days are swifter than a runner; they fly away without a glimpse of joy. They skim past like boats of papyrus, like eagles swooping down on their prey. [that is what the last 3 years have felt like...when O Lord will I find relief]

I loathe my very life; therefore I will give free rein to my complaint and speak out in the bitterness of my soul. [so true]

I am full of shame and drowned in my affliction.